a story about llamas and Jesus

By Emily Sue and her friend Andrea during class. 

–           –           –

Once upon an eternity, Jesus was chillin’ with God. God said, “Son, I am going to make people.”

“Cool beans,” said Jesus, “What’re they?”

“Things that will love Me… but you’ll have to die for them,” replied God.

“Don’t worry; I’ll be glad to do it!” said Jesus, “But…”

“Yes?” questioned God.

“If you create people, can I invent My own creatures that will love Me?”

“Sure! Why, that’s a stupendous idea!” said God.

“SWEETNESS,” said Jesus, “They will have four legs, and sticky-up ears. They will have short fluffy tails and furriness all over them.”

“What will You call them?” asked God.

“I don’t know yet…” said Jesus, “Can I also create another animal?”


“Okay. This one will have a wide, flat, gigantinormous mouth/bill/beak. It will be shiny and live in the water. Maybe Australia. I will call it a Llama, and the fuzzy thing I mentioned earlier will be a Platypus.”

“Those. Names. Suck.” said God. “Switch them around!”

“But the shiny thing doesn’t sound like it should be called a platypus!”

“Well the fuzzy thing should still be called a Llama,” Said God.

“Okay, the fuzzy thing will be a Llama, and the shiny thing will be called an Andrea.”

“Awesome,” said God.

So Jesus made Llamas and Andreas.


Many years later, one Human testified as Llama-spit dripped down his face, “The Llamas turned evil…”

The End


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